I am permanent disable veteran from the Nam war, who has suffer 45 year As I focus on the painful aspect of this self discovery of my own decaying spiritual deficiency; it been a long time lost in the sins, of this open sinful society offers, I cry every time I saw those that didn’t care to welcome us home, and kept calling us baby killers, spitting on our faces, creating an immoral hatred against our country, and the horrifying fear trying to sleep; because of my despair, fears, of dreaming about the rivers of blood, and mounts of dead bodies robbed me of my sanity. After facing death on the operating table because the war follow me home, and in the ghettos of my surroundings I started to ripped this horrible impregnated pain in the walls of my mind, making me scream into the wind while driving; seeing soldiers still wearing their uniforms begging on the street corner in a ghostly state of hiding their pains, and the pimps of our society dress as clergy and in full fancy dress, only appear during after the problems started, only to grabbed the T.V. attention, I asked God to please guide me and, remove what I had in my heart, this hatred, that keep me in the confusing solitude, that understand your drowning in liquor, causing me to loose my family. I established a close relationship with God, and He guided my hatred anger into written words in poems, first I tried to re-set Gods name back into our courts; and money, schools, society but I thought I was to late, the devil had taken over me he was showing me his work making the Lord obscure by trying to cover him with veils of lies, I tried to translating why Jesus Christ has becomes obscure in his relationships to our children, and the rest of mankind, I was becoming part of this social entrapment, after being part of all those behind the masquerading lost souls, I found comprehension that has been missing in the American conscience, I manage to find the bridge between those that suffer in silence, our soldiers, the elderly, single parents and the hateful youth whose pain was the reaction to the bad drugs, yet my poems and thoughts brought peace, and joy to them, I hope who ever read this book, become part of his surroundings.