This is not your father's wedding . . .

Congratulations on your engagement, my clueless friend, and welcome to a world for which you are sadly ill equipped. You have entered a new dimension. A dimension of china patterns, ice swans, and boutonnieres. You're planning a wedding, and your fianceé expects more from you than a diamond ring and a blood test. So, you'd better get up to speed--and fast.

From the best proposal to the coolest honeymoon, The Clueless Groom's Guide offers light-hearted commiseration, guidance, and a distinctly male take on the entire process of planning a traditional wedding. It gives you a sorely needed chuckle and some surprisingly useful advice to help you get through the many decisions your bride-to-be will pretend to want your opinion on, including:

• How and where to pop the question--and when to cue the mariachi band
• Why engagements of over two years are justified only by extended commitments to the armed forces and/or unusually long jail sentences
• How to pick groomsmen gifts and groomsmen who almost deserve them
• Reception sites that offer style and originality . . . and why you should avoid them like the plague.
• And far more than you should ever rightly know about weddings