'The stranger stands over me like a creepy uncle re-buckling his buckle after playing the secret game with his sisters' youngest. The pungent aroma of his death-breath infiltrates my nasal passage like a bare-knuckle fist clutching a pound of rancid offal inside a radiator resting hill-walkers sock. That's gonna' linger like a lone lesbian in a gay bar come closing time...' In the early hours of Christmas day a technophobic private investigator using the pseudonym Phil Noir is taken by a rifle brandishing stranger into unfamiliar woodland, before demanding a hole be dug. Three weeks prior, working out of a small south London office Phil takes on a somewhat incoherent new client named P.S. Ngamunye; intending for her identical twin-sister Mena to be located after a thirty-year separation. Forty-something Phil lives alone and has developed a cynical outlook with much disapproval toward modern living, but maintains a healthy eye for the ladies with a wry mind ripe for a sometimes-inappropriate quip and a penchant for luxury brand toilet paper. Realising the missing woman Mena has learning difficulties, it also comes to light that their mother died when the twins were only twelve-years old and after hiding her body made an attempt for several months to live independently. Unwilling to own a car, Phil utilises TFL's services to get around the loathsome city using an Oyster card. As the journey unfolds Phil encounters several new life experiences ranging from the world's least erotic web cam show to risking life and limb for an anti-social neighbour. All before bisexual ex-girlfriend Fiesta Duval sparks up an unexpected return in the build up to the silly season... 'Fille Noir' is the debut novel from Marc E.Bear. A blackly comic and sometimes disturbing modern day detective novel that twists like Chubby Checker. In a similar vein to Chuck Palahniuck, Brett Easton Ellis and Irvine Welsh it should appeal to readers with an open mind. 'There's a moments silence as we glance un-lovingly into one another's eyes like a scene from any Clint Eastwood film. The good ones, anyway; Pink Cadillac or either of those with the orangutan.'