I teach, therefore I am... poor.Learn Me Good is the hilarious first person account of ayear-in-the-life of a brand new teacher. Inspired by real-life experiences of rambunctious and precocious children, lesson plans gone awry, and incredibly outrageous quotes, this laugh a minute page turner will give you a new appreciation for educators.Jack Woodson was a thermal design engineer for four years until he was laid off from his job. Now, as a teacher, he faces new challenges. Conference calls have been replaced with parent conferences. Product testing has given way to standardized testing. Instead of business cards, Jack now passes out report cards. The only thing that hasn't changed noticeably is the maturity level of the people surrounding him all day.Learn Me Good is Jack's retelling of his sensational rookie year, written as a series of emails to Fred Bommerson, his engineering buddy. He holds a March Mathness tournament, he faces a child's urgent declaration of "My bowels be runnin'!", and he mistakenly asks one girl's mother if she is her brother. With subject lines such as "Irritable Vowel Syndrome," "In math class, no one can hear you scream," and "I love the smell of Lysol in the morning," Jack fills each email with sarcastic observations, insightful comments, and plenty of irreverent wit.If you've ever taught, you will undoubtedly recognize aspects ofyour own students in Jack's classroom. If you've never set foot in aclassroom, you will still appreciate the funny quirks, behaviors, andquotes from the kids and adults alike.I teach, therefore I am... poor.Learn Me Good is the hilarious first person account of ayear-in-the-life of a brand new teacher. Inspired by real-lifeexperiences of rambunctious and precocious children, lesson plans goneawry, and incredibly outrageous quotes, this laugh a minute page turnerwill give you a new appreciation for educators.Jack Woodson was a thermal design engineer for four years until hewas laid off from his job. Now, as a teacher, he faces new challenges.Conference calls have been replaced with parent conferences. Producttesting has given way to standardized testing. Instead of businesscards, Jack now passes out report cards. The only thing that hasn'tchanged noticeably is the maturity level of the people surrounding himall day.Learn Me Good is Jack's retelling of his harrowing rookie year,written as a series of emails to Fred Bommerson, his engineering buddy. He holds a March Mathness tournament, he faces a child's urgentdeclaration of "My bowels be runnin'!", and he mistakenly asks onegirl's mother if she is her brother. With subject lines such as"Irritable Vowel Syndrome," "In math class, no one can hear you scream," and "I love the smell of Lysol in the morning," Jack fills each emailwith sarcastic observations, insightful comments, and plenty ofirreverent wit.If you've ever taught, you will undoubtedly recognize aspects ofyour own students in Jack's classroom. If you've never set foot in aclassroom, you will still appreciate the funny quirks, behaviors, andquotes from the kids and adults alike.