"3/4/2020 I am grateful for the consistency of friends in my life. I am grateful to those beautiful individuals who I call family. I am grateful for learning to love myself. Lastly, I'm grateful for my desires. I have been tenaciously trying to better myself. Beating myself up and just going through the highs and lows to arrive at the point where I am. It might be the hardest thing to accept, that I am worthy of ushering in what I want to see. That a good outcome could come from all my tears, years, and fears. Ultimately, I'm fighting with the feeling that the way I am is somehow wrong and can't work in this world. I don't know how else to say it. What has the world come to that people feel they can't be accepted? Their ideas aren't worthy and if brought into the light people would see them as ugly? Because we're around that. We judge others. We can't reconcile our differences or appreciate what makes another unique. I am too much in some ways and not enough in others. I know I can do better. I absolutely want to. That comes through learning. Who will teach us to accept ourselves and then move forward in a powerful way? Not this disempowered, I'm ugly, bad, "not good enough as I am" way. I would love to do that!"