This book is the heart wrenching story of a young man who has grown up in a cold coarse reality of being a foster child. He was abandoned by his father, and given up at birth by his mother due to harsh conditions which his mother endured. The author was faced with many dilemmas and confused feelings growing up as an abandoned child. The turmoil which the author endured always came back to the point that he seeked real love and affection. The author never received real love or had an insight of how true love felt or should feel. As he continued down his dreary loveless path. He began to show love, but when it came to receiving care, trust, and the love needed he did not know how to receive it. The author would hide from love, not truly understanding the meaning behind someone opening their heart towards the wretch of his soul. This work expands over 20 years of blood, sweat, and tears while the author tries to express love through his heart shaped box which he has come to know today as his heart. With this said he continues with hope and faith to keep this door open and have a glimpse of what real love should feel like.